Man bites snake

With Pax winging his way to unknown shores for a work-related and well-deserved rest, it falls on the Beer Baron to maintain the high quality and stringent standards of Pax Arcana. So here’s the first of what I hope will be many posts over the weekend until Pax gets back Monday.

 

If a dog bites a man, according to the old newsroom adage, it’s not news. But if a man bites a dog, well, stop the presses!

 

That’s apparently just as true if a man bites a snake. From the Associated Press, via boston.com:

 

A Northern Ireland man bit off the head of his girlfriend’s pet snake during a fight and remarked that it “tasted lovely.”

 

 

The biter, a 33-year-old bricklayer named Shane Cooke (no word on the name of the bitee), apparently had one too many Guinness and decided to abuse his girlfriend and her pet python. He admitted in court to headbutting the poor lass twice and throwing the severed head of the snake at her. What a charmer.

 

But herpetologists everywhere, rejoice! Headless snakes had their revenge! Check out this headine from the the Seattle Times:

 

Decapitated snake bites Prosser man

 

Apparently, 53-year-old Danny Anderson and his son trapped a 5-foot rattlesnake on their Central Washington farm and chopped its head off with a shovel. From the Times:

 

“When I reached down to pick up the head, it raised around and did a backflip almost, and bit my finger,” Anderson said. “I had to shake my hand real hard to get it to let loose.”

 

The kicker is that Anderson, after being bitten by a large, venomous and clearly irate snake’s head, had to be talked into seeking medical attention:

 

His wife insisted they go to the hospital, and when they arrived 10 minutes later, Anderson’s tongue was swollen and the venom was spreading. He then was taken by ambulance 30 miles to a Richland hospital to get the full series of six shots he needed.

 

Call me a coward, but if I get so much as an annoyed look from a rattlesnake, I’m damn sure getting those six shots. You can’t be too careful these days.

 

- Perry

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