Make sure you get one last taste of your favorite scotch tonight, faithful reader, because it will be your last.
That’s because the deranged psychopathic gang known as “European scientists” plan to kick start the Large Hadron Collider (LHC) early in the morning. As we’ve already documented, the infernal machine will almost certainly create a black hole that will suck all life on earth into the dark abyss of nothing.
Of course there are still those who insist that life as we know it will not actually end with the flip of the On switch — but these are desperate times and those are desperate people.
Farewell, loyal Paxists. My only regret is that we didn’t have more time together — so that I could yell at you for not stopping this abomination.