Apologies for the scarcity of content on the site this morning. Pax Manor is quite busy at the holidays, and Santa’s going to have my nuts in a sling if I don’t finish these…
Oops. I’ve said too much.
Anyway, I did have time to catch the big NFC showdown last night, in which the New York Giants (official American tackle football team of Pax Arcana and defending NFL champions) defeated the Carolina Panthers. The win secured home field advantage for the Giants and gave this guy (two thumbs, pointing at self) the vapors at the return of my main man, Brandon Jacobs:
Jacobs scored the winning touchdown in overtime after the Giants staged a nerve-wracking fourth quarter comeback, needing a touchdown and a two-point conversion late in the game to tie it up.
Game note: If Jacobs and the Panthers’ D’Angelo Williams got gay married, the two of them would have been the co-guardians of seven touchdowns last night (Jacobs 3, Williams 4). And the paparazzi would call them D’Brangelo.
Jacobs and Derrick Ward — the Earth and Wind of the Earth, Wind, and Fire triumvirate — will get the lion’s share of the credit for last night’s victory. But I was most encouraged by something else — the return of the Bossman, Kevin Boss. The Giants’ tight end returned to his late 2007 form last night, scoring one touchdown and snagging multiple third-down short passes. At this point I think Tom Coughlin buried him on purpose during the regular season.
In other hilarious NFC news, the Eagles and Cowboys both lost this week in embarrassing fashion, proving that both teams — and their fans — are booger-eating half-wits.
Meanwhile, the Hartford New England Patriots absolutely annihilated the craptastic Arizona Cardinals at home yesterday. Many in the media suspect that Arizona simply laid down their arms for the Pats, since their playoff position would not change win or lose. But a drubbing is a drubbing, and there’s no way they meant to take it to the chin like this.
The best part of the game was watching Bill Belichick wince after Larry Fitzgerald’s touchdown made the score 47-7. Somewhere, Gregg Easterbrook grew a new pock mark.
Here’s hoping for a rematch of last year’s Super Bowl…