Tag Archives: NFL

Tony Gonzalez wants to know if you’re going to finish that asparagus

Pax Arcana 

Between Michael Pollan’s newest book, In Defense of Food, and this article in the New York Times, some might start believing that meat is on its last legs, so to speak.

The Times article, by astute food writer Mark Bittman, seeks to draw a parallel between American dependence on fossil fuels and our dietary dependence on animal proteins. The numbers say we are consuming more dead animals than ever, but that might change as a result of rising food prices. And reducing consumption of animals might make us healthier, Bittman says:

Americans are downing close to 200 pounds of meat, poultry and fish per capita per year (dairy and eggs are separate, and hardly insignificant), an increase of 50 pounds per person from 50 years ago. We each consume something like 110 grams of protein a day, about twice the federal government’s recommended allowance; of that, about 75 grams come from animal protein. (The recommended level is itself considered by many dietary experts to be higher than it needs to be.) It’s likely that most of us would do just fine on around 30 grams of protein a day, virtually all of it from plant sources.

Pax Arcana does not buy this for a second. I’m not the type for breakfast sausage or hamburger lunches, but like a lot of Americans, I start to get a little quakey — and a little angry — if I go too long without protein. And the most efficient delivery mechanism for protein is meat.

tony_gonzalez_broccoli.jpgBut according to this WSJ article, NFL superstar Tony Gonzalez doesn’t have that problem. Apparently Gonzalez was turned on to veganism by a fellow passenger on a flight. After failing in his initial effort (he lost 10 pounds in three weeks and had regressed in the weight room), Gonzalez worked with the Chiefs’ trainer to customize a mostly-plants diet with a few servings of fish and chicken thrown in:

After a preseason practice, he accompanied Mr. Hinds to learn a skill he believed as important as blocking techniques: how to shop for groceries. Mr. Hinds showed him nutritious fish oils and how to pick out breads dense with whole grains, nuts and seeds. “The best bread for you,” says Mr. Hinds, “is if I hit you with it, it hurts.” Mr. Gonzalez also learned how to make the fruit and vegetable shake he drinks each morning. He stocked his pantry with tubs of soy protein powder and boxes of organic oatmeal; soy milk and Brazilian acai juice crowded the fridge. His favorite dessert became banana bread topped with soy whipped cream from the vegan cafe near his home in Orange County’s Huntington Beach. Mr. Gonzalez soon recovered his lost pounds and strength.

As 2007 champion of my fantasy football league (Jersey Turnpikes represent!), I am honor-bound to refrain from criticizing my starting tight end. But I will say this: It’s probably much easier to adhere to a plant-based diet when you’ve got personalized consultants and chefs to help you out. For most of us, though, meat will remain the best mechanism for consumption of protein because A) It has a lot of it, and B) It tastes awesome.

So unless you’re planning on making meat more expensive — or letting Father Scott cook it for you (zing!) — my guess is rumors of meat’s demise are greatly exaggerated.

Rethinking the Meat-Guzzler [New York Times]
The 247 lb. Vegan [WSJ]


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Dear fellow Giants fans: Let’s not get carried away with all this


Look fellas,

We’re all happy about the Giants run, getting hot at the right time and so forth and etcetera. Pax Arcana is just as happy as the rest of you. My grandfather was a passionate Giants fan who died just months after the Giants’ last trip to the big game — a humiliating defeat to the detestable Baltimore Ravens in 2001. We want this game for him as much as anything else [Pours leftover Christmas Glug on the ground].

That said, this is a bad idea:


The last thing the Giants need in the Super Bowl is Eli Manning crapping his pants at the sight of 10,000 laser-beam-eyed death women. The guy practically soiled himself racing Peyton to eat a cookie. We’re not sure he wouldn’t run off the field covering his eyes and screaming if a critical mass of G-Men supporting mooks storm the Taco in these heart-attack inducing contraptions.

Please, Giants fans. Think of the children.

Moynahan Mask Meant To Bug Brady Like Romo [Sports By Brooks]

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Third Tynes a charm


So a team with an unproven QB, a bend-don’t-break defense, and a cantankerous coach marches through the playoffs against heavy favorites in every game — only to square off against an “unbeatable” opponent on neutral turf in the Super Bowl. Sound familiar?

I’m not saying it’s going to happen. I’m just saying it could.

And, I think football fans the world over should thank the New York Giants for sparing us two weeks of obsequious Favre-licking from every brain-dead stuffed suit on the teevee.

Take it away, Eli:


Added: The NY Post likes (to steal) our headline.

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You. Damn. Right.

Q: What’s Eli Manning doing when he’s not pulling crazy bitchez?


A: Makin’ crazy bitches cry.



Giants 21, Cowboys 17 [ESPN]


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The Giants went 10-6 this season. Their schedule included two games each against the Redskins, Cowboys, and Eagles, plus games against the Packers, Bears, Vikings, and Patriots.

And every blow-dried, fake-laughing mongoloid on the teevee yesterday picked them to lose to the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, a 9-7 team that spent the year playing the Falcons, Panthers, and Saints and barely broke .500.

We think they’ll probably lose to a strong Cowboys team next week, but can we at least start giving the G-men some damn respect around here?

As for Eli, one of Pax Arcana’s knowledgeable house guests pointed out yesterday that the Giants led the NFL in dropped passes (42) during a year when Eli finished with his highest completion percentage ever. He’s no Tom Brady, but it would be nice to see what he could do with Moss, Stallworth, Gaffney, and Welker.

That is all. Thank you.

- Pax Arcana 


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Friday Random 10: Giant edition

eli.jpgOur brother-in-law seems convinced that the Giants are going to lose to the Tampa Bay Buccaneers this weekend — despite the fact that the Bucs are only in the playoffs because they won the worst division in football (the Giants, for the record, played the Cowboys, Eagles, and Redskins twice each and went 10-6 on the season), and the Giants came within one dumb luck turnover of beating the mighty Patriots a week ago.

We are confident. We don’t think the Giants will go any further, but we do like them to beat a Tampa Bay team that will rely 100% on Jeff Garcia. Plus we’ve got Eli. What could go wrong?

Here’s what we’re listening to as we plan our Sunday menu (game starts at 1 p.m.)*:

Torn and Frayed, The Rolling Stones
Something of an End, My Brightest Diamond
Octopus’s Garden, The Beatles
Burning, Fugazi
How Could I Know, My Morning Jacket
City Song, Matt Pond PA
Australia, The Shins
You’ve Got Her In Your Pocket, The White Stripes
Upward Over The Mountain, Iron and Wine
Hurricane Jane, Black Kids

Bonus video: The Equestrian, Les Savy Fav (great song, hilarious fan video)

* The Rules: The Friday Random 10 is exactly that — random. We open up our iTunes, set the thing on shuffle, and listen to 10 songs. We are not permitted to skip any out of embarrassment or fear of redundancy. Commenters are welcome to post their own.


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Bill Belichick is the coach of the year

And not just the Pax Arcana coach of the year. He’s also the AP Coach of the Year for the 2007 regular season — an award sure to drive Gregg Easterbrook deeper into paranoid delusiontown.

We crap on the guy a lot, but we thought we’d handle this latest triumph with dignity and discretion. Then we thought we might write stupid stuff on a picture of him and post it on this blog. We did the second thing.


Belichick is named AP Coach of the Year [AP]

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The Gospel According to Ray: Credit God for the Wins, Blame Officials for the Losses

raylewis.jpg“Life is about making a stand. Making one stand that I know things won’t always be the way I want them to be, but I got faith enough to know that whatever it is, I’m OK with it because I know God is willing our mind… You don’t run from losses. You go through them, because when you go through them, that’s what builds a man, that’s what builds integrity, that’s what builds character – going through things, not around them.”
- Ray Lewis, 10/7/07

*”This was Sean’s win. And it’s embarrassing the referees took it away” - Ray Lewis, 12/3/07

All class as usual.

* This quote has been corrected from the original post. The wording, as reported by Rachel Nichols, is slightly different than what Pax Arcana heard on the teevee last night. The meaning is exactly the same.


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MNF Countdown: Tom Brady and Bill Belichick vs. Ray Lewis and his so-called “God”

Our prediction:

Patriots 41
Ravens 12


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Colts employee says Colts are liars

An unidentified security guard told a WBZ reporter during the Colts-Pats game that the Colts pump crowd noise back into the PA system to make it louder in the RCA Dome.


Granted he’s only a security guard and not a sound engineer, but there seems to be an awful lot of smoke for something that’s not a fire. I guess you really can’t call the Colts liars though, since they never denied doing it in the first place.

Security Guard Claims Colts Enhance Crowd Noise [WBZ]

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