Ronald Long of Deepwater, MO, was having a heck of a time poking a hole in the exterior wall of his house. He needed that hole so he could get the new satellite dish hooked up. So he did what any red-blooded American would do under similar circumstances — he fired two shots from a .22 at it.
Officials at the scene said the whole thing was an accident, punctuating their soundbytes with folksy charm and sentence-ending prepositions:
“He was under the impression that everybody was inside the residence, that he knew where everybody was at,” said sheriff’s department spokesman Maj. Robert Hills.
Guns don’t kill people. Morons with guns kill people. And most of us are morons.