Richie Sexson has poor depth perception

Pax Arcana

Sometimes baseball fights are justified. If a pitcher deliberately tries to injure one of your top players — especially with a ball up in the cranial region — I say it’s time to regulate.

However, if you’re Richie Sexson… and you’re batting .209… and the pitch doesn’t come close to hitting you… you may want to just let it slide, big fella.



Filed under baseball

14 responses to “Richie Sexson has poor depth perception

  1. Colin

    Regardless of how dumb Sexson is, Gabbard looks like a real wimp.

  2. I think he was just surprised. Plus Sexson’s friggin huuuuge. I’d run like a jackrabbit from that guy.

  3. Fallen Angel

    aww don’t hate on kason. i might still like the sox if he was never traded.

    “formerly good player.” what a perfect summary of richie sexson.

  4. Thanks, but I think I will hate on Kason.

    I saw him pitch at double-A a few years back and remember thinking, well, he’s only OK as a AA pitcher, so I’ll never see him in the majors. I was wrong, but that’s more of a commentary about the state of pitching than anything.

    Plus, his fucking name is Kason. Who’s his dad, Roger Clemens?

  5. speaking of roger, this reminded me of when manny charged the mound after clemens threw a pitch that really was nowhere near him, which led to the pedro-zimmer incident. that was such bullshit on manny’s part. and that is the only time i’ll ever write anything that could be in any way interpreted as a defense of anything roger clemens has ever done.

  6. Manny was wrong to charge halfway out to the mound on that pitch, however the major precipitating event of the Pedro-Zimmer incident was Zimmer charging out of the dugout like a horny wombat. As a Mets fan and huge Pedro admirer, that was one of my favorite baseball moments ever.

  7. Perry Ellis

    More like a horny gerbil.

  8. Manny did freak out there, but as I remember, hadn’t there been tension building? I think Manny had been thrown at the day before or something. I seem to remember thinking that he probably was expecting it, which is why he blew it out of proportion. I don’t know, it was a long time ago and I was young.

  9. yeah, there was already tension at that point in the game. i’m not positive, but i think a yankee got hit by pedro, and then maybe karim garcia slid hard on a double play ball or something? i dunno. those were the good old days when the yankees dominated. i weep.

  10. You’re right. There was a lot of back and forth. If I remember correctly, one of the Sox pitchers had totally nailed Matsui or Sheffield the prior inning, setting up the confrontation. Everyone expected Clemens to throw at Manny, including me, Manny, and Clemens. I think he actually was trying to hit him deliberately but just missed. Manny was already worked up about it before he got in the batter’s box. I’m a bit hazy on the details because I was drunk at the time. But that’s what I remember.

  11. Birch

    I saw this on sportscenter this morning. It seems like Sexson was just looking for any half reason to charge because one of his teammates was hit twice earlier…

    I always want to see a pitcher just start running away from the batter and watch them run after each other through the outfield….trying to hide behind the backs of fellow teammates…

  12. Seriously, what would be the harm in that? Your teammates would probably call you names, but you’d also make the entire world laugh like crazy. If I were a pitcher I’d hit somebody just for that. I’d put on the biggest scaredy-cat face and run into center field like my ass was on fire.

  13. Perry Ellis

    Padre: From the always-worth-reading and funny King Kaufman:

    “There’s very little evidence Gabbard has any idea where the ball is going when he throws it. He’s walked 70 and struck out 79 in 131 and a third career innings. Sexson could argue — if he just didn’t mention the corners thing — that Gabbard was throwing at his head and missed over the plate. Then again, Gabbard could argue he was trying to hit him in the butt.”

  14. Perry Ellis

    And this just cracks me up:

    “Rangers manager Ron Washington sniffed that Sexson overreacted. ‘If we wanted to hit him, we would have hit him.’ Eh, maybe.”

    King Kaufman: Bill Simmons without the homerism, bad writing, crap pop culture references and witless Vegas escapades, if Simmons was also funny.

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