When they’re not busy explaining that, “No, sorey, American dollars won’t work up here,” and “Thanks for the invite, but we’re OK not being annexed already, sir,” authorities in Vancouver, Canada are trying to figure out why feet keep washing ashore there.
Yes, you read that right.
In the past eight months, four right feet — still in their shoes and socks — have washed ashore on the western coastline. Investigators are using good old shoe-leather detective work to run this one down, but find themselves going in circles:
The police say they are treating the cases as suspicious, but are quick to play down the wilder rumours about gangs and tsunamis. Forensic experts say it is actually quite common for body parts to become separated after they have been in the water for a long time.
Why only right feet have been found is still a complete mystery.
The police say it is possible the feet come from the passengers aboard a small plane which crashed into the water in the region several years ago – their bodies were never recovered.
Meanwhile, on a deserted island deep in the Pacific, Locke limps out of the jungle with a bone saw, dragging a bag full of feet with messages crudely tattooed on the soles.
Sorry. I finally started watching “Lost.”