Like every sophisticated raconteur with an eye for the finer things, I spend a good amount of my time watching the History Channel. I am quite fond of ancient history, as long as it’s presented by people with British accents in 7-minute digestible nuggets broken up by Plavix commercials.
In fact, I enjoy the History Channel nearly as much as I enjoy polo, yachting, and bemoaning the deplorable state of the country club’s hedgerow (Raymond, the hedge trimmers can’t use themselves you know…).
So imagine my surprise when I put down the latest Robb Report and picked up Newsweek (the gardener is learning to read), only to find that the latest Egyptology documentary may be full of enough shit to fill the Sphinx’s litter box.
According to the article, the forthcoming documentary “The Lost Pyramid of Giza” purports to break the news that scientists have discovered the location of a fourth Giza pyramid that was even taller than the so-named Great Pyramid.
The only problem is that everything written above may be completely false:
Egyptologists have known about Djedefre’s pyramid for years. It was discovered a century ago—or rediscovered, since tomb raiders and stonemasons had been picking it over for centuries. If it hasn’t been explored until recent years, that’s in part because the pyramid sits close to a military exclusion zone, probably the site of nearby surface-to-air missiles. For the record, the structure isn’t really on the Giza plateau, which is five miles to the south, and while it may appear larger than Cheops, that’s only because Djedefre’s hill is so high—the Great Pyramid is more than twice as tall in absolute terms. Some Egyptologists say that the slope of Djedefre’s walls—60 degrees, as opposed to the 52-degree slope of the major pyramids—mean that the star of “The Lost Pyramid” is really just a sun temple. “It has never been lost,” says Vassil Dobrev of Cairo’s French Institute of, “and it is not even a pyramid.”
I am not qualified to judge whether Vassil Dobrev is right about this. However, I am qualified to judge who has the tastiest strawberry shortcake in Minnesota. Well done, Mrs. Anna Hoekestra of Duluth!!