Ctutu sure fooled those white guys this time!

Pax Arcana

Bnguli! Hey man, I’ve been looking for you. You been gone at monkey hunt and you missed all the fun!

Oh man, Ctutu can’t stop laughing about this one. Wait til you hear what we did to the white people a few weeks ago.

Ctutu was walking around encampment all hungover and stuff from fermented masticated yucca drink looking for nose bone. Don’t know what happened to it Bnguli. Just fell out the night before. Was wrestling with Rwutu so maybe that did it. Never did find… anyway that’s not the point of story.

Point is Ctutu was walking around encampment when hear engine noise from white guy flying machine. Rwutu come out, too, and Mwewete. We decide to play joke on white guys and start shooting bow and arrown and blowgun at flying machine. Like we never see it before. Rwutu jumping up and down like total asshole making crazy jungle noises like “Wok wok wok” and acting all scared and shit. Ctutu firing blowgun at airplane like it some kind of metal bird and I’m all scared and whatnot.

Mwewete all covered in blue dye cause she passed out night before and Rwutu and I shamed the shit out of her. Hilarious!

Anyways, white guys fly around for a few minutes taking pictures, and Rwutu and Mwewete and I all hopping around and firing stuff at plane and making jungle noises.

We think it funny thing to do for ten minutes, but get this — the white people think it real! They write in white people news that photographer find “uncontacted” tribe in Amazon! They show pictures of me and Rwutu and Mwewete all jumping around and say we primitive man found in jungle!


Like we haven’t been known about since 1910 or something!

Anyway, this week pilot guy tells truth about us — that we’ve been “discovered” for almost 100 years. Other white people now pissed at him for flying so close to us when he knew where we were. They had GPS tracking us!! Isn’t that freaking hysterical!

Now maybe we finally get Starbucks in encampment.

Secret of the ‘lost’ tribe that wasn’t [The Guardian UK]


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