Shawne Merriman is a freaking genius

Pax Arcana

Shawne Merriman is famous for two things:

1) Being really good at football


2) Using steroids to get really good at football

I humbly submit that we add a third thing to this list:

Shawne Merriman is a freaking genius who is smarter than four doctors combined.

You might think Merriman must have been wearing his bad idea jeans when he told the Chargers he would play this season against the advice of four (FOUR!!) separate doctors who suggested he have career-saving surgery now and come back for the 2009 season. But Merriman, whose IQ far exceeds that of the typical bunched up piece of paper, wisely reckoned that at age 24, he is too old to not risk a multi-million dollar career on the 2008 season:

“I know what’s at stake,” Merriman said Wednesday. “But I had a goal with the team before the season started, and I’m sticking to it.”

When asked how sure he was about playing, Merriman replied, “100 percent.”

It is precisely this kind of insight that has served Merriman so well in the past. Like that time he promised to blast Tom Brady in the mouth before getting humiliated in the AFC Championship Game (hat tip: Fallen Angel). Or that time he invented the “Lights Out Dance.”

The good news is that football is not dangerous in any way:

Merriman to play despite 2 torn ligaments [Fox Sports]


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