Sometimes, when you find out that your girlfriend is actually a dude, or you break your wrist playing patty cake with a six year old, or get fired for soliciting [EDIT: amusing freudian slip fixed thanks to Perry] sex from the president of your company, you just need to share that story with the rest of the world.
Luckily for you, some French guys inspired a site that now allows you to do so. Enter fmylife.com (ht: The UnDefinable One):
Fmylife.com contains short day-to-day life anecdotes. A simple recipe: in one sentence, each site visitor can tell the shitty moment which ruined his day. These short stories must begin with “Today” and end with “FML”. On top of being a huge escape valve and delightfully proving that “fuck ups” happen to everybody, fmylife.com aims to be funny and enjoyable to read on a daily basis.
OK, that description was kind of gay, but you get the idea. Sign up for an account and craft a quick description of what ridiculous situation you’ve gotten yourself into.
Some of the posts are pretty terrifying and embarrassing.
Today, I had a sexy dream, woke up and started to masturbate quite vigorously. When I finished, I hopped off the top bunk naked to see my brother and his girlfriend laying in the bottom bunk. FML
Some are funny and karmic.
Today, I walked in the snow and saw some kid slip. I laughed and felt good about myself. Then I fell. FML
Some are motherfucking creepy.
Today, I walked in on my porn addicted roommate watching a gynecologist exam online. He asked me to watch it with him. FML
Keep your eyes out from one by a user called mrspax. It will probably read, “Today I found out I was pregnant. My husband is elated and debating between the names ‘Thor’ and ‘Spaghetti Cat’. The only person I have had sex with in three months is a short, angry work friend of my husband’s while watching wrestling and chugging Natty Ice. FML.”