Look out, fat cats

Pax Arcana

Back when Guns ‘N’ Roses was the most kickassest band on the planet (who would have thought Appetite For Destruction would hold up so well?), my favorite band member was neither Axl Rose nor Slash. Those two were the brains of the outfit, but I preferred bassist Duff McKagan.

duffWhile Rose and Slash exuded all the brash confidence of rock stars ascendant, McKagan was the band’s everyman — a tall blond doofus who seemed as confused as anyone about how he’d arrived at this moment. His blank stare, awkward stage movements, and on-camera stuttering said it all about what it was like to be an average guy in the white hot spotlight.

For the past two decades, McKagan has followed the traditional course of peripheral rock stars — booze, drugs, sex, rehab, booze, drugs, sex, rehab, etc. — but apparently he’s found a new niche.

Duff McKagan is going to clean up Wall Street.

According to the New York Post, McKagan was recently hired to write a crusading column on reforming the financial services industry for Playboy Magazine — which was already the most respected source of financial advice in the country:

Answering critics who would doubt his expertise, McKagan said he began studying finance in 1994 after “I got sober.”

With time on his hands, he said he rummaged a file drawer full of old financial statements covering a six-year period at Guns N’ Roses, only to discover they were too confusing to comprehend and were “meant to mislead.”

After plunging into the study of finance and economics at Santa Monica Community College – and later at Albers School of Business at Seattle University (he’s just a few credits shy of a college degree) – the bass player became a widely quoted media source about the economics of music and rock bands.

McKagan admits that his level of education leaves a lot of gaps to be filled, and — to his credit — doesn’t pretend to know everything there is to know. But he does promise “to expose frauds and criminals, one at a time,” so look out for that I guess.

Bonus Video:

Paradise City — Guns ‘N’ Roses



1 Comment

Filed under music

One response to “Look out, fat cats

  1. Perry Ellis

    I am so sick of your prejudice for tall, blond doofuses. It’s like you know one or something.

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