I swear it’s not mine

Pax Arcana

panda_boyThe L.A. Times is reporting that Bai Yun the giant panda is pregnant, and is expected to give birth next month. Which is a total surprise to me — I mean it’s not like I know the intimate details of Bai Yun’s sex life or anything.

Doctors at the San Diego zoo — which I did NOT visit last winter — say ultrasounds show two fetuses in Bai Yun’s womb. Unfortunately pandas rarely carry twins to term, so chances are good Bai Yun will deliver only one interspecies hybrid baby panda cub.

In the meantime, the 17-year-old Bai Yun has been removed to a special “denning” area prior to delivery. Hopefully they took her cell phone away, too — if only to keep her from calling the father every twenty minutes and howling into the phone. Not that I know who the father is… I’m just saying that could be pretty annoying if that’s the case.

Bai Yun’s last offspring ended up giving birth to six more cubs, all of which were 100% PANDA DESPITE MEDIA REPORTS TO THE CONTRARY. Although it would be crazy if a panda and a human were to mate, and live together in a bamboo grove somewhere in the suburbs with their half-breed child. I guess it would be a “manda” in that case. I’d name her Amanda the manda. Just daydreaming is all…

San Diego Zoo announces giant panda Bai Yun is pregnant (and may give birth to twins) [LA Times]


1 Comment

Filed under science

One response to “I swear it’s not mine

  1. you totally fucked that panda.

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